Zero on the Dead Fish Scale
I measure whether the lake is worthy of wading or not on the dead fish scale. Apparently this is wrong but I’ve done it since the ripe old age of seven circa 1994 when I was allowed to wade into the lake on my own and found a fish, head all mashed floating right by my waist. Needless to say, it ruined that outing. (How can you pretend to be the Little Mermaid when Flounder’s head is missing? And anyway, Martha the class monitor and all knowing keeps telling you that Flounder deserved it becuase he eats the dead bodies of Tutsis?) Thus, the dead fish scale was created and has not failed me since.
Its simple, no dead fish very good wading and good beach weekend, one or more dead fish, stay away from the water,day spent at table listening to brenda fassie scream "this is your wedding day! oh your wedding day! " for the gamillionth time while sipping desperately on a coke.
Sunday was a good beach weekend, zero on the dead fish scale. Pretty much the usual, we walked down from the house to resort beach, mother, sister and cousins galore. It was an adventure walking down the main road. On the left, we had the golf course where guys with hang-overs attempted the game but balls kept flying a little too close for comfort. On our right, still drunk 4-wheel drive owners careened wildly along the road.
We got to the beach though, persuaded the guy at the gate that four of my cousins were all 13 instead of just one (true age = 18,17,and 15,) and my eight year old cousin got passed off as six, thus free....sometimes I wonder if they really fall for this trick or do they just let us think they did?.....Pulled up chairs, got my mom a Tusker, got the 8 year old on the swings and headed off to the beach and found it a lot bigger than it used to be. Never really believed when they said that the lake was drying up but I had to walk an extra 20 feet just to get to the water….. And the rotting wood posts that used to be way out, far away, marking the water depth, were within wading distance……can’t help but feel that by the time I’m fifty, Lake Victoria will be nothing but a glorified pond….
And the beach was spectacular before the Sunday crowd flocked in. The sand was soft, the water was clear, the sky was breathtakingly blue and it was quiet. We sat on a picnic table set in the water just listening to the waves, our paddling in the water beneath us.
………It would have been greedy to ask for anything more……
I measure whether the lake is worthy of wading or not on the dead fish scale. Apparently this is wrong but I’ve done it since the ripe old age of seven circa 1994 when I was allowed to wade into the lake on my own and found a fish, head all mashed floating right by my waist. Needless to say, it ruined that outing. (How can you pretend to be the Little Mermaid when Flounder’s head is missing? And anyway, Martha the class monitor and all knowing keeps telling you that Flounder deserved it becuase he eats the dead bodies of Tutsis?) Thus, the dead fish scale was created and has not failed me since.
Its simple, no dead fish very good wading and good beach weekend, one or more dead fish, stay away from the water,day spent at table listening to brenda fassie scream "this is your wedding day! oh your wedding day! " for the gamillionth time while sipping desperately on a coke.
Sunday was a good beach weekend, zero on the dead fish scale. Pretty much the usual, we walked down from the house to resort beach, mother, sister and cousins galore. It was an adventure walking down the main road. On the left, we had the golf course where guys with hang-overs attempted the game but balls kept flying a little too close for comfort. On our right, still drunk 4-wheel drive owners careened wildly along the road.
We got to the beach though, persuaded the guy at the gate that four of my cousins were all 13 instead of just one (true age = 18,17,and 15,) and my eight year old cousin got passed off as six, thus free....sometimes I wonder if they really fall for this trick or do they just let us think they did?.....Pulled up chairs, got my mom a Tusker, got the 8 year old on the swings and headed off to the beach and found it a lot bigger than it used to be. Never really believed when they said that the lake was drying up but I had to walk an extra 20 feet just to get to the water….. And the rotting wood posts that used to be way out, far away, marking the water depth, were within wading distance……can’t help but feel that by the time I’m fifty, Lake Victoria will be nothing but a glorified pond….
And the beach was spectacular before the Sunday crowd flocked in. The sand was soft, the water was clear, the sky was breathtakingly blue and it was quiet. We sat on a picnic table set in the water just listening to the waves, our paddling in the water beneath us.
………It would have been greedy to ask for anything more……
3 comments
why do i get the feeling that i know you? as in in real life? nod and wink or prove me wrong...
REPLYi miss Uganda..
REPLYish, you could know me. lol its possible and you feel familiar but your blog is real life airtight so first i have to figure out, who are you?
REPLYhi! thanks for commenting. I'm always open to new ideas. I can't wait to hear yours.